I'm a 36 year old IT Manager at a University in Providence, RI who is currently discerning a priestly vocation.

The Voyage

The Voyage

The world’s thy ship and not thy home.
— St. Therese of Lisieux

Brothers & Sisters,

I get together with a dear friend each week for (at least) dinner and last night as we were eating the idea of knowing when you were going to die came up. Specifically two things, the first being if you could see when you were going to die would you want to know and secondly would anything in your life change by suddenly knowing that date.

I believe I would not want to know when I was going to die even if the option were offered to me. However, if I did know when I was going to die, I questioned whether or not anything would change and I’m not sure it would. To add a little specificity to this comment, we’re talking about not dying tomorrow but presumably in the future (say at least 3 months from now). My reasoning behind not changing a thing is that if I feel as if I am living the best life that I can right now then I can’t possibly imagine changing anything. I’d probably still get up and go to work, volunteer at church, continue school, always be there for my friends, pray, write, etc. There was a time where I would have probably said that I would change a lot, but that’s not how I feel any longer.

I’m not sure I’d say that I am ready to die (I don’t think any of us ever are), but I’m content with the path my life has taken and where I am right now. Regrets are a thing of the past, and I’m focused on the right here and right now. That doesn’t mean that I am not weary of our mortal end that we’re all barreling towards at varying rates of speed. But it does say that I’m not terrified of it like I once was. I’m not terribly comfortable with the idea of dying; however, I know I’m going to be a much better place and the knowledge of that far outweighs the fear of mortality.

Our death is something we should be reminded of constantly so that while we’re here, we understand that what we do here in this mortal realm is what shapes us for the rest of eternity. If we can always keep that reminder close to us in our hearts and minds, then there is no excuse we could possibly make for not living a life filled with grace. Sure, we’re human and have bad days but as long as we don’t let those days rule us and consume us then we will remain on the path pointed towards that perfect and most beautiful end.

Yours,
Jeff

Photo by Artem Sapegin on Unsplash

Thankful

Thankful

Perfection

Perfection