I was out to dinner with my parents, brother and sister-in-law last night and we got to talking about Christmas gifts and what people wanted and the question eventually made it’s way to me (I tried my hardest to dodge it) and the only real thing I could come up with was, nothing. Truth be told Christmas, even when I was a young boy was never about the presents. I always felt a deep desire to just be with my family, friends and loved ones that day. Nothing else mattered to me other than that.
Almost 100 posts and thousands of words later my great summer experiment is coming to a close with this post. In June I challenged myself to write or at least post to this site every single day for 90 days. I went past that day by 9 days and have decided that my post today wrapping it all up will mark a new change in my posting frequency, more on that later.
I've spent the last couple of days fairly angry at my church. I've buried myself in my work even more than I normally do to keep my mind off of what happened Tuesday. I probably would have moved on much sooner than today had someone not felt it was right to text me that I should enter the seminary because I'll become like one of the priests in Pennsylvania. I was at a loss and couldn't figure out what would make someone say something like and think that it is ok to do so? So I lost a person in my life that night but quite frankly they probably didn't deserve to be there anyway.
I'm not phoning it tonight but I really just want you to sit back and listen to this song and let peace wash over you. The past few days have been some of the hardest I've encountered over the past few months and have managed to shake me to my core. I needed a reset and tonight I felt like it was time. I want to feel other emotions than sadness, stress, heartbreak, anger, and shame. Happiness and peace are important and it's time to start feeling them again. Enjoy this song, it's had me in tears more times than I can recall.
Whatever you want to do, whether it's writing or draw or take photos I'd challenge you to stop talking about it and just start doing it. I know it sounds so cliche and I always thought it was until I embraced that notion and got to work. The days you struggle and get through it will make you stronger and more prepared for the next tough day you have.